“Lack of Empathy” and other misunderstandings

lately i’ve been thinking about how the textbooks on autism have always said that we lack concern about and don’t have empathy for, other people. They also state that we are “trapped inside” and “in our own world”, well it might appear that way because often our body language suggests that we are absent from conversations and not paying attention to those around us but this is definitely not the case. If I sometimes look like i’m not interested when someone talks to me i usually get a “you hear me?” or “are you listening?” out of them. When this happens i just want to say that yes i hear you and i’m actually trying to process your voice against the other (usually louder­) sounds in the background. Almost always this takes way longer than it should due to not being able to filter out other irrelevant noise and concentrate on what the person is saying. At work it becomes even harder because i work around a bunch of machines that are loud because they use a vacuum for keeping envelopes on the conveyor belts so they can be printed. when it comes to stereotypes of autism i really wish there weren’t so many because it’s wrong to make someone feel like just because they are autistic that they are not all “there” wherever there is LOL! I But in all seriousness, this supposed “Lack Of Empathy” leads a LOT of us to depression because, contrary to what most of you have heard we DO have emotions but it’s the expression of them that can throw you off. i often wish that there were schools where autistic and other socially awkward people could learn what to do but i guess that’s kind of unrealistic because of the almost infinite number of variables. Trying to figure out all social nuances and such that “normal” people take for granted all the time is very time consuming because it involves comparing my actual knowledge of how social nuance works (which is still a work in progress by the way) to their perceptions of what i know and they do make value judgements based on that. That is also why i’ve been called almost EVERY ableist slur in the book (which i will not go into on this blog just so disabled readers don’t have to wince when they read it. (keep in mind my “lack of empathy” lol) well i have run out of words to type but i hope that you will realize that people like me are trying our best to make it in the world and we don’t mean anything by it if we sometimes seem to ignore subtleties of communication and i hope this helps you understand (some of it ate least but more on that later.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s